Howdy peeps! 
Thank you so much for the amazing response to the Booja Booja giveaway. They are seriously delicious chocolates and there is still plenty of time to enter. The giveaway ends next week. So all the chocolate fiends in the land enter, enter, enter!
Now for a little rewind to some of my eats…
On Monday and Tuesday my eats during the day were more of a snack like affair as I had to work straight through the lunch demonstrating some experiments to the undergraduates. This was at a weird time of the day starting from mid morning to mid afternoon on both days. I started both days well with a green smoothie and oats for breakfast:
I loaded up of the fruit and a Nakd bar before each of my demonstrations as I knew that I would get super hungry. On both days I got home around 3.30 which was too late for lunch, but I still needed something to tide me over until dinner. I opted for a Summer Pudding Green Smoothie on both days.
Dinner on Monday was leftover Red Lentil and Root Vegetable Stew that is based on my Pumpkin, Swede and Red Lentil Curry recipe. I served it on steamed mange tout, brussel sprouts and savoy cabbage.
Followed by two apples and two avocado cups. I also had two extra apples.
I love these things! 
Tuesday for dinner I made turkey meat balls with vegetables in a tomato sauce served with corgette “spaghetti.”
This was sprinkled with Engervita, which is a yeast based product that tastes cheesy. For dessert I had warm Almond and Hazelnut rice milk with frozen berries and a pear.
On Monday I didn’t workout as I was too tired, but this means I can just move the toning workout to Saturday instead. Tuesday, however was my spinning class, which had doubled in size. There were at least 18 of us compared to the usual 7 at the 7.30 am class. This really got my instructor hyped up as she was insistent on “battering our bodies” – her words not mine! It was torture, but I loved it as per. I followed this one hour class with 20 minutes on the cross trainer, 10 minutes on the bike and 10 minutes on the step machine.
I managed a little bit of shopping on Tuesday too. I stepped into Holland and Barratt’s and my local independent health food shop, which is always well stocked with some unique ingredients.
Almond and Hazelnut rice milk x 2, Vanilla rice milk, Chocolate oat milk, Chocolate Brownie Trek Bars x 2, mixed seeds, edamame beans, pear and apricot spread and natural yeast extract. I wish I had got the Meridian organic one that they had in the independent health food store, but it was buy 1 get one half price in Holland and Barratt so this will do for now.
Health food shopping is my thaaaang! It’s like a hobby. I go into the health food shops wondering what new and interesting ingredients I can pick up.
Yesterday I was back on form with my eats i.e. three proper meals and a snack. I thought I would get an early start at uni instead of going to the gym in the morning, just for a lil’ change. So for breakfast I had a yummy bowl of yoghurt topped oats again. I love the combination of the warm oats and cold yoghurt. This time I made a Choco Toffee Fudge mixture using one of Yeo Valley’s toffee flavoured yoghurt pots.
I mixed 1/2 cup of oats, 1 1/2 cups of hazelnut and almond rice milk and 1/2 cup of water with 1 tsp of organic cocoa powder, 1 tsp of maca powder. Toppings were dried cranberries and cashew nuts…yum!
For lunch I feasted on a fab salad using the new vegan pesto that I had picked up the day before and some lychees.
This included mixed leaves, shredded corgette, parsnip and carrots, sweet red peppers, cucumber, seeds and basil tofu. I stirred through 1 1/2 tbsp of the vegan pesto. This was so tasty. I loved the basil overload from the pesto and the tofu and the raw parsnip was delicious too! 
Afternoon snackage came in the form of Kale and Sundried Tomato Hummus spread on 2 sweet onion ryvita crackers with a soya chai latte (without the coffee).
This hummus is a-maz-ing! If you have never tried to make your own hummus I highly recommend it. I’m definitely a convert to making my own and this one from Lolo is oh-so-good!
When I finally got to the gym it was so busy, but hadn’t reached queuing for machines stage yet. This meant the gym was hotter than what I was used to, meaning I was dripping in sweat. I did 30 minutes on the treadmill, 30 minutes on the cross trainer and 15 minutes on the step machine followed by my usual ab routine.
When I got home I was also in a baking kind of mood. After watching Baking Made Easy on Monday night I was dying to try out the Dreamlike Shortbread recipe, so I did!
Dinner yesterday was left over Red Lentil and Root Vegetable Stew with steamed broccoli, seeds and Engevita.
I followed this with a chopped apple and some RAWR Zest and Lindt dark chocolate.
I also ate a slice or two of shortbread to finish off my night.
The significance of the shortbread? As delicious as it was I felt so guilt afterwards for eating it. Not at first, but the guilt sure enough reared its ugly head. Long before I started writing this blog I used to struggle with eating the right amount of food I ate and the amount of calories I consumed. I used to under eat and try and ignore the hunger pangs as much as possible. This was until I fainted and later diagnosed with a mild form of hypoglycemia. After this point I decided to lead a more healthier lifestyle and eat a balanced diet. My mindset towards food has changed dramatically and I have come to terms with the fact that food is not the enemy.
No body forced me to eat the shortbread. I wasn’t mindlessly eating it either. It was a conscious decision made my me and me alone. Some of you are probably thinking “why all of this fuss over some shortbread?” But its more than that. It is more about my mentality towards food and fearing that I have slipped back to that dangerous place I dragged myself from a few years back. I can see your point though as I don’t know whether to laugh or cry at this post. “Normal” people, who have always had a healthy relationship with food wouldn’t care about a few extra pieces of shortbread. I thought I wouldn’t care either, but evidently I do.
I don’t want to go to that place again. I now enjoy my food, love being creative with food and look forward to eating my food. All day to day I have been trying to get that healthy mindset back, but I guess that will take some time. I know I eat healthily and responsibly, but none of this is about that it is about my own relationship with food. I know one thing- I no longer feel guilty about eating the shortbread, that was yesterday and this is today. However, I think I may have some old demons to deal with, but at least for now my my conscience is clear.
Do you ever get hit by guilt in relation to food? How do you deal with this?
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